In that 2nd pro-league I had 0:5 and in some tournament at school (we were playing there on Saturday and Sunday) I had 1:5. In that tournament there were 22 participants from the top four school leagues.
From my perspective, it all looks like this:
In openings, beginnings of fights and counting in endgame I am stronger than these Chinese pros, who train here (and amateurs). In further fighting, positions of being cut everywhere and beginning of yose I am weaker. But, when I enter byo-yomi, I have no chance to win. I play really much worse than anyone. In the very majority of matches, up to 100 moves, I’m winning. Then sometimes opponents catch up, sometimes not. But, when I enter byo-yomi, then the lottery starts. However, there are some matches, when I feel depressed after previous losses, which should be won. Then I play completely hopelessly.